Last day of the decade

It has been 10 years since I was that clueless teenager just out of school ready to enlist into the military. What does one do in 10 years? Well, we grow up, for one. Military training, university, a year abroad, and two years in legal practice. I daresay that this decade, more than any decade, will be the decade that has most shaped my life, my beliefs, my psyche.

We are the Y2K generation, we lived through 9-11 and economic booms and busts. We are a cacophony of citizen media, the generation that has gained so much but (almost) lost it all as well.

Looking forward, what does the next decade have to offer? Reconciliation between the Koreas and the Chinas? Increased social and political freedom? The economic emergence of Africa? No one knows, and the above is conjecture at best. It's out of my hands, and what I can control, is but my own destiny, and the hope that my life may have some impact on others.

I'm still working on that. May the next decade be even better than this one. Happy New Year one and all :)

Life

Time flies. Today is (hopefully) my last working day of the year. Its unbelievable actually, how I have managed to pull off being a litigator for the past year. The hours of toil i had to put in, of which I am glad I had a chance to, had moulded me to become a totally different sort of lawyer than what I first started out to be. It was a good move, indeed, to be doing this now at this point of time.

Now that I finally have some time until next year, lets get some stuff done:

(1) Lasik surgery
(2) Set up Structured Deposit account with the Bank
(3) Christmas shopping
(4) Get a nice tan (weather permitting)
(5) Catch up with old friends (call me!)
(6) Read "How to win every argument: the use and abuse of logic", and Beckman's "Case Analysis and Statutory Interpretation"(Hopefully doing (1) doesn't preclude me from doing (6))
(7) Dental Checkup
(8) Health Checkup
(9) Write Christmas cards
(10) Upload Taipei Photos

Its kinda sad how legal practice takes up so much time, I even have to take leave just to run errands. But so far, no regrets.

Reason

Because of you, I feel as if I am part of a big family

What if

"She shed tears over her friends dying in the 1918 flu epidemic. That generation-my parents' generation- lived through a lot. They lived through the epidemic, which took ten percent of the world's population. And then came the first world war, then the depression, then the second world war. They didn't have much of a chance. That was a very tough period. My father would have been much more sucessful in a different kind of world."

Malcolm Gladwell, "Outliers: the story of success"

And I thought, "what if....."

Repeat mode

回忆是抓不到的月光握紧就变黑暗

Showing off

Just read a particular Singaporean's blog this evening, wherein he posted a picture of his paycheck for this month on his blog.

I don't have an issue with that per se, it's just that he works in an insurance company, and his remuneration last month was S$19,500. And he had to post it on his blog.

I don't know which irks me more, the fact that he was showing it off on his blog, or the fact that i don't even get a third of what he's getting despite being in a "respectable profession" and working hard too. $#%#%$#@@#@

Subdued silence

In our neverending pursuit of pleasure, gratification and fulfillment, we, or at least myself, may somehow forget that the troubles that we have may not be so major after all.

0259 hrs.

Closing time at an anonymous wine bar. The phone rings incessantly and the usually cheerful head waitress looks with utter disdain at the source of constant ringing. "We are closed for the day!" she mutters in exasperation. The manager and I exchange wary looks. We all knew there was no one else in the right mind, and indeed he was far from being sane after the head waitress told him that she had to end the physically abusive relationship, absolutely no one else in the right mind calls a restaurant/wine bar at 3 in the morning. We knew, he was lurking outside the shophouse, waiting for her. So we locked up the premises, and he appeared, hurling vulgarities and grabbing her towards the back alley to talk. I stood, powerless, as the manager went to confront the guy, who turned increasingly violent. Escalation ensued and grab became manhandling. He called the cops, while the stalker took possession of her bag and forced her into the cab in his attempt to take her away. I am glad the 3 taxi drivers (he tried multiple times) had the sense to not drive off, and I desperately tried to stop them from leaving until the police finally arrived and took control of the situation.

Postlude.

I sometimes secretly begrudged my work because of the perhaps unfounded thought that, unlike medicine, what I do does not directly benefit the lives of the people around me. Tonight perhaps, the research that I did this week on how to lodge a magistrate's complaint against a person may have some application somehow. Tomorrow, we shall see if we have to go to the crime registry.

Thunder. The change in the air is apparent. It's time to head back.

Monotone

Amongst the thunderous pounding of footsteps and heels streaming out of raffles place mrt. Yawns. A new week starts again.

Drifting

some days i feel like jetsam floating on the sea and i cannot understand why i feel this way

Secret Formula

They say to be happy one needs to have:

(1) Something to DO;
(2) Someone/something to LOVE; and
(3) Something to HOPE for.

I don't disagree with the general statement above, but I have to add that the above presupposes that one already, inter alia, (i) enjoys a stable, conducive working/living environment; (ii) has enough money to meet his/her daily needs; and last but not least (iii) enjoys good health.

Which brings me to my main point. Staying at home in Singapore drifting in and out of consciousness within a 37 to 39 degree temperature range is by far cry the lesser option than spending the long holiday weekend in Bali with good food good friends and having a good time.

Happy? 绝口不提

Rule

History has shown us that, more often than not, oppression and coercion brings forth discontent and rebellion.

Inadequacy

I fight so hard because I sincerely believe it is worth fighting for.

Oh Lord, be my light to shine my guiding path.

Words of wisdom

Night. At the back of my mind, a whole backlog of cases. Looking out onto the silent park below. Mulling on what the pastor said today. It's true, people pray so hard for God to improve their circumstances. Flashback. Another night, another city, praying so hard for a scholarship (that never came) just to make ends meet and to put food on the table. Through that, God taught me the value of Herr hard work, and to trust in him. In the end, it all worked out, more abundantly than I could ever asked for. Thinking of Trish in Australia again. How encouraged would she be if she heard today's message? Twenty days more to the eight lunar month. Mooncakes. List of recepients for mooncakes. Check. Passport? Check. There is something I am wishing for. Is there something that YOU are wishing for? Be still, this wandering heart. Be still. The basil plant's scent and the silent call of rest for the night. Tomorrow the sun will rise and so will I.

Weekender

Weekend nights after twelve without alcohol + Monocle magazine + Jazz + a spot of weeding/fertilizing/trimming + research on random interests = satisfaction on a level I do not get during weekdays

Dream interpretation

Its strange, I had this dream when I was snoozing between my usual wake up time and when my mom came in screaming hysterically "you're late for work!" I really don't know what the following dream means:

I spotted two slithering tails in my kitchen cabinet (where all the snacks are), they were lizards, but they were huge! Like the size of my forearm, and one of them slithered into the huge crockpot of boiling water, and i could see it bubbling away. Soon after, the other huge lizard slithered into the pot, and I could see its face in agony as it disintegrated at the mouth, and started swirling in the pot of boiling water, and all I could do was stare stunned at the swirling mess.

Departures

I will miss her terribly when she goes, but she and I both know that there are too many things i just cannot leave behind here...

Advertisement

Isn't this so true? Cleverly done ad, isn't it.

The whole truth

"Who among them, you wonder, grew up longing to be in product management or marketing research? Who lay in the summer grass aged ten staring up in the sky thinking how magical it would be to one day sit in a glass box beside a freeway revising contracts?No one. Instead you know that beneath their suits and khakis your employees are an army of poets, chess wizards, baritones, fantasists, whittlers, spankers, animal lovers, gamblers, gluttons and sudoku nuts"

Taken from "What they teach you at Harvard Business School - my two years in the culdron of capitalism" by Philip Delves Broughton

Fitting in

I found out today that I have left the last vestiges of desire to revert to my corporate lifestyle when the bantering of my ex colleagues from Corp failed to even excite a tinge of buzz within me. Meeting SGX deadlines are definitely not as exciting as discussing strategy to bring down an opponent's case.

Am preparing for two hearings at the end of this month and itching for a fight!! Wish me luck!

Dreams are what you wake up from

2 Day MC = Time spent with mom + rest at home + home cooked food + ability to monitor shares + 10 hour naps + TV, TV, TV


I could live like this forever

The draftsman speaketh

It's amazing how something that boggled the mind until 2 am the night before could be solved by nifty drafting on the train on the way to work, thanks in part to mcdonald's "premium" brewed coffee.

Will be off to Court for a hearing today.... Been itching for a fight for so long! Then again we the black and whites are mere agents of the hand behind, and if there are no clear instructions, then our hands are bound.... You see, we are still mere servants

いとしいあの人の姿

Monday morning.

Irrational exhuberence

Global companies are still cutting jobs, companies are still going bankrupt, trade is nowhere near 2007 levels and the flu continues its ominous march.

Nonetheless I have finally decided to put some money into equities, investing in one commodities counter and one local transportation counter. Well, in bad times people still need to eat and travel to work, or at least to look for work don't they?

Nonetheless if investers are confident of the economy, it's a self fulfilling prophecy, or so my wallet hopes.

The incredible lightness of being

I admit. I love reading fmylife because after reading all the loserly events that occur to other unfortunate souls, hey, our life doesn't seem to suck so badly. One word: SCHADENFREUDE.

Let me have a go.

I was on the train home today when I noticed this adorable nus med school student (med text on lap.. ooh a looker and smart!) was smiling at me. Of course, doing the natural thing I smiled back, only to realise that she was sharing a joke with her friend over the phone just that her earpiece was obscured by her long hair. FML.

(based on a true story, but well the truth usually isn't as noteworthy)

A posse ad esse

Being faceless in a crowd is the same whether we are in Singapore, Tokyo or Melborne, all we need, is to know what we are doing and who we are doing it for, because it gives meaning to what would otherwise be meaningless.

I told you today that you are the the main reason why I am still based here. Perhaps one day you will finally understand

...and we say adieu to yet another fantastic weekend

The absence of light breeds discontent

Again, a new blog to reflect a new phase of life, without the baggage and the history of a past life.

A little about me: an ambitious go-getter who finished a decade of education just to join the ranks of the white collar salarymen class. My day starts with me rushing out of the house, sleeping on the train, working to clear as much work as i can, then coming home late to hit the sack, to press the "replay" button until Friday comes.

They say it will all get better once you are no longer at the bottom of the scrap heap supporting the very corporate ladder we are climbing. They say, your legal experience will open doors. They say, chase your dreams. They say, believe in yourself.

Note the incongurence in the above.

Didn't we all used to dream? Is this the dream that we wanted? A reasonable paycheck, a noble possession, a challenging job environment, or are we really the generation which cannot keep a stable lifetime job, forever itching to run away somewhere where the grass is greener....